I started writing because I knew that I did not want to be simply a “victim” of my past. I know that I don’t want what happened to me in my past to determine how I live my life now and in the future. I started telling my story through the best way I know how: writing. If I can help just one person to face their own past, then I can consider my mission successful.
Being100% accountable teaches us that we are not victims of our past, our future is not predetermined, and our lives are what we choose from this moment on. (Shickler and Wallace, The 7 Mindsets)
So, how can we be 100% accountable? Here are a few places to begin:
Own Your Life
When you begin to allow the opinions and actions of others to matter more than your own, you are giving away your ultimate freedom. If you don’t act for yourself, make decisions based on what you want and think, then you are ultimately a victim of another’s decision making. Is this what you want?
No one wants to be called a “victim” or made to feel like one. Therefore, in order to be 100% Accountable – be accountable to yourself first. Make decisions based on what is best for you, your goals, and your life. Yes, it is important to think about others when you make decisions, but there is a fine line in thinking about others and thinking about what others will think.
Overcome Limiting Beliefs
Limiting beliefs. These are fears, excuses, and counter mindsets that stop you from reaching your goals. We form our beliefs through direct experiences, and unfortunately those experiences that are harmful or hurt us ‘stick’ more than the good experiences. Do you ever tell yourself, “I can’t sing,” or “I’m really bad at math,” or “I will never be able to get in shape”? These limiting beliefs have come from an experience, and then something bad happened, and then we draw conclusions that we can’t do or have this experience again.
Limiting beliefs are also centered around fear. We are social animals, and we thrive on the acceptance of our peers. However, when we go about doing something that is abnormal, or that our other peers aren’t doing, it is a fearful place to be! We might immediately shut down the thought of opening our own business, writing a book, or travelling the world alone because we are afraid others might not approve.
Overcoming limiting beliefs is one of the biggest action steps you can take to being 100% accountable for your life. This is a huge step, and it is hard to do! As humans, we will always have limiting beliefs that we are working towards reprogramming. The best way to do this is realize it, figure out why this belief is holding you back, and how you can get past it.
Focus Your Energy
How do you spend your time? You do know there are 24 hours in a day, and let’s give a generous 8 hours of sleep… 16 hours of awake time. If you have a full time job, that’s 8-9 hours… so, let’s say, Monday to Friday you have 7 hours of free time a day and on the weekends, 16 a day. How much of that time are you watching Netflix? On social media? Complaining about life to someone else? Why aren’t you using that time to further your dreams?
While everyone needs down time, you do need to think about restructuring your time and energy so you get the most out of every moment. Listen to a podcast while folding laundry; read a book for 30 minutes if you need to relax instead of turning on the TV. Take little steps to restructure your days – of course including fun time!
Where you expend the most energy is where your priorities are, and by holding yourself accountable to spend more energy on what matters most to you, you will begin to see changes in your goals and aspirations.
Grow Through Life
Life is very unpredictable. We only know what has happened in our past, and what we are doing this very moment. We need to be able to lean into life’s changes and proactively develop the strengths to get through all obstacles. Focus on building skills that will take you to where you want to be. You can control what you do and what you learn, what you think and how you react. Once you realize this, you have become 100% accountable and are capable of creating the life you want and deserve.
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